waiting.

about a month ago, my grandpa's health started to go a little downward. he's diabetic and is on at-home dialysis, so anything else that comes up is pretty scary. he went in for some tests and was sent to a hematologist. they told him he could possibly have cancer and after about a week of waiting, we found out he is cancer free. then he was sent to a urologist who ran more tests and found several cysts on one of his kidneys. after about a week or so, we found out they were benign. we started to have hope that things were going to start getting better, but monday he was admitted to the hospital. his blood pressure has been really low and his heart rate really high. poor guy is just sitting there having to do a bunch of tests. they found high amounts of an enzyme called troponin in his blood, which could mean that his heart has been damaged some how. now we are just waiting to see what the doctors next moves are going to be.

i love my grandpa. he has been the closest thing i have had to a father my whole life. some of my earliest memories are with him in them. i remember he taught me how to write my name, how to ride a bike and he was the only one who could make me smile when i was mad or bummed out about something when i was little. he used to do some of the most random, kindest things for me. i remember being about 4 or 5 and it was night time and pouring rain outside. he got me bundled up and took me for a walk in the rain. i admire this man so much. i cried when i met my husband because i couldn't believe that there really was someone out there as good as my grandpa. to this day, he still makes loving gestures towards my grandma, like rub her back and put his hand on her knee. this year, in october, they will have been married for SIXTY YEARS. they occasionally bicker, but i have never in my whole 28 and a half years, heard them fight or say something mean to one another. i love them so much it hurts.

my whole heart goes out to him tonight. hopefully they will figure this out soon, get him better and back home to my grandma, where he belongs. please keep him in your prayers.